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Love bites, slaps and rapes: violence against women no longer taboo

by / Monday, 26 July 2010 / Published in Leadership
violence against women by vampires

In a time not so long ago, women were regarded as something special. Representing 50% of the human race, she has been a very prominent focus throughout all of human history, legend, myth, tradition and culture. Lusted after if not worshipped.

She is credited for succumbing to the first temptation of mankind in the garden of eden. Resulting in her role becoming one of temptation herself. She is the portal by which all humans enter the earth. She has embodied, beauty, art, drama, patience, resilience, strength, and love. She is perceived as  the most beautiful of all creation summoning awe in humanity, both in males and females. Advertising in its first incarnations have tantalized us with her form.

Tradition and world culture have shared many viewpoints on the woman. They have gone to war over her.

He is to touch and speak to her with a gentle strength that secures her heart, and a home of peace for himself.

Woman and men may be equal in their right to human life and the right to pursue happiness, yet woman are distinct. They are different. A man and a woman perceive the world with the same set of basic human instincts, yet they are expressed very differently. And how. Sitcoms will have no material if we ever figure out the key to understanding those differences.

This is the stage upon which our species carry out the great drama of human relationship.

Men have long since regarded women as the ultimate goal of conquest. The last temptation that they are unable to resist and under the very adoration of which all men yield their last reserve. Men have been created with the raw instinct to be fascinated with her at least, and completely ruled under sexual surrender to her beauty and wiles at worst. But one thing is certain men cannot ignore their female counterpart.

This is why, in western culture, it has been an amazing historical path we have taken in our views of women, and the man’s relationship to and with her. With its roots birthed out of traditional Biblical principles, men have been held to a standard of care and provision for women. She is considered the weaker, or more delicate, creation. Men have been raised to handle her with care. To ensure she and her children are never without food, shelter and protection. Defend her until his death. He is to touch and speak to her with a gentle strength that secures her heart, and a home of peace for himself.

That standard was reflected, although, not without hypocritical and abusive exceptions, throughout the last several hundred years. Even during the darkest of times, in a chauvinistic way at least, men still carried out their task as hunter and protector. Cave men are even depicted as dragging his woman around as a gesture of ownership responsibility. Thank God, we have moved passed that depiction of normal. Or have we?

Hollywood has helped to break down the wall of gender roles by inserting fabricated and distorted perspectives of female empowerment.

In recent years, an unsettling return to the past has taken form. Women may have finally won their war against men for true equality. Men now don’t seem to give a care about her needs. He takes no personal responsibility for her or the child he plants in her womb.

As far as he is concerned, women can fetch their own food, shelter, and money… just as long as she is there to provide him with sexual service upon his demand. I feel a sickening sensation every time I see this disturbing slide in misogyny and abuse, especially when it is now being redefined with intellectual words.

Hollywood has helped to break down the wall of gender roles by inserting fabricated and distorted perspectives of female empowerment. Do women realize most of these movies that feature sexual violence, dehumanizing behavior and contempt are written by men as part of their own sick personal fantasy?

Rough sex, or rape? Vampires. This is a popular trend in pop culture today that has captivated the even the youngest of girls. With scenes of passion, orgy and bloodlust, these modern heros are portrayed with honor, respect and sexual curiosity. They seem to say the right things at the right times. They are also capable of enacting the same level of malevolence without care if the victim or foe happens to be a female. Is it bravery to disembowel a women because you are a creature warrior with supernatural strength? Oh yes, since she was “evil” she deserved to be treated with abusive violence, plus she was dishing out the violence in equal proportions against the man. Oh, and she “wanted it”.

Movies used to hold violence against women away from the screen as a way of preserving the wholesome roles of human interaction.

Movies used to hold violence against women away from the screen as a way of preserving the wholesome roles of human interaction. What society would ever consider rape, torture and violent consensual sex as entertainment? Is this true equality for women? That men are allowed to beat, stab, draw blood from biting, strangle and then force a sexual act upon her. It is argued now that in fact he is NOT forcing himself. She is consenting. Really? It is not defined as rape, it is rough sex.

The September issue of Nylon features an interview with Sookie Stackhouse and her vampire lover, Bill Compton’s alter egos, Anna Paquin and Stephen Moyer, as well as “True Blood” creator Alan Ball.

In it, Stephen and Anna talk about their steamy love scenes in the hit HBO series. What I found most interesting – and judging by the comments on the Huffington Post link, so does everyone else – is a comment made by Stephen in which he refers to Season 1′s sex-in-the-cemetery-mud scene as “rape.” Here’s his full quote:

It’s difficult stuff for a bloke, but a vampire gets away with it

“The thing about vampirism is that it taps into a female point of view – you have an old-fashioned gentleman with manners who is a f***ing killer… it’s an interesting duality, because in our present society it would be an odd thing for a woman to say, ‘I want my man to be physical with me.’ How, as a modern man, can you f***ing work that?”

“It’s one thing to be polite and gentle… But when do you know it’s OK to crawl out of the mud and rape her [as Bill does in one scene]?… It’s difficult stuff for a bloke, but a vampire gets away with it…. I think that’s the attraction of the show – it’s looking back at a romantic time when men were men, but they were still charming.”

Female equality with men has been redefined to mean an equal measure of disrespect, and contempt. Misogyny is now permitted to hide behind a hollywood script. In the end, a woman’s victory in equality may have only served to reward her with a colossal defeat.

Apparently, nothing says “I love you” like a punch or bite to the throat.

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